It was a relationship so low-key that it almost feels like we imagined the whole thing — but Nicole Kidman and Lenny Kravitz really did date back in the early aughts; in fact, they were engaged! Yup, in truly wild A-list scenes, Kidman was nearly stepmom to her Big Little Lies costar Zoë Kravitz. So, why did the wedding never happen? Let’s look back at one of the most secretive and intriguing celebrity couples of all time:
How It Began
Well, it’s a “meet cute” of sorts: in 2002, when Kidman, 58 — a year or so after her divorce from Tom Cruise — was renovating her home in New York’s West Village, she needed somewhere else to live. Enter Kravitz, 61; rock star, scarf wearer and, it turns out, property mogul. She sublet his Manhattan apartment and it seems he was a more attentive landlord than most; by 2003 they had discreetly started dating.
How Long It Lasted
Tough one, since at the time they pretended the whole thing wasn’t happening. They often attended the same events in New York and Hollywood, including David Copperfield’s birthday party and a night out with Kidman’s close friend Naomi Watts, but would arrive and leave separately, 30 minutes apart.
Kravitz would also visit Kidman on the set of her 2004 movie The Stepford Wives. “He’s always here but nobody sees him,” an on-set source told Luxury Handbag Shopping at the time. “He enters through a back door and goes straight to her dressing room.”
Late in 2003, Luxury Handbag Shopping exclusively broke the news that they were engaged, but it was only many years later that they admitted it was true. However, the wedding sadly never happened.
How It Ended
Kidman was a busy working mom at the time; her kids with Cruise — Connor, now 30, and Isabella, now 32 — were still little, and she didn’t really feel like she had time for a serious love thing.
“I didn’t really want a relationship,” she told Vanity Fair in 2007, without referencing Kravitz by name. “I just wanted my kids to have me, and I didn’t feel comfortable having some person in that small hubbub. And then I got engaged to somebody … but it just wasn’t right. I wasn’t ready. We weren’t ready.”
What They Said About Each Other
At the time, they said very little; in fact, Kravitz even told Access Hollywood in 2003 that they were just friends. “She’s a nice woman,” he offered. However, he also hinted there was more to it when quizzed by reporters around the same time, “Sometimes it’s better to keep things under wraps,” he said. “That’s the only way you have any privacy.”
Kidman’s spokeswoman Leslee Dart was a little more revealing, saying in 2003: “They’re very close. He’s very important to her. Beyond that, I don’t know.”
What They Say Now
It took a little time, but both Kravitz and Kidman are now open about the relationship — and it sounds like there’s no bad blood between them despite them ultimately calling off their wedding plans.
On the Big Little Lies press tour in 2017, when asked about her relationship with costar Zoë, Kidman even casually dropped the engagement bombshell, which had never been confirmed. “I knew Zoë because I was engaged to her father,” she said. “It’s all in the family! I love Lenny; he’s a great guy.”
A few months later, Kravitz also enthused about Kidman in an interview with Mr Porter’s The Journal. “Nicole is amazing,” he said. “Zoë and she hadn’t spent time together since she was younger, since Nicole and I were together, so that was great.” Wait, you guys were together?! Now you admit it!
In 2018, he divulged a few more details in an episode of Watch What Happens Live With Andy Cohen. “I thought it was very interesting that they ended up on the same show,” he said. “It was beautiful that they got to know each other as adults and make this great show together.” He added: “Some things just don’t work … the wonderful thing is we’re all friends.”
Zoë, too, has reflected on her long relationship with Kidman — and the secrecy surrounding it. “I think she forgot that no one knew that!” she told The Edit. “I hadn’t seen her in a long time before Big Little Lies, but there was a point where we were all kind of living together. I was about 13, and she would take me to see movies; she was so nice to me.”
Kidman, too, has been very kind about her never-quite-stepdaughter. “I feel protective, like a big sister, toward her,” she told Elle in 2020. “She is carving her own path with confidence and grace. She’s having a big moment now, but it’s only going to get bigger. She’s a triple threat because she can dance, sing and act. She is deeply feminine, and she always smells so good!”
Key Relationship Takeaways
This relationship proves that it is possible to keep A-list relationships low-key … but also proves that you can’t always believe the stars when they claim they’re just friends. Ultimately, this romance was the basis of a solid friendship — plus it gave Kidman a taste for rock stars; she went on to marry Keith Urban in 2006, and the couple share two daughters.
Proving that the exes really are on good terms, Kidman, Kravitz and Urban have even hung out together at awards ceremonies — and these days they’re thankfully way less shy about being photographed together.
